40 before 40

I few years ago, I was scrolling through Tumblr and came across this post of this girl’s goals. It was twenty-five things she wanted to do before she turned 25. Or maybe it was 21 before 21, I can’t remember. But I thought this was such an interesting concept for goals. Some of her goals were big, others small but all seemed to be achievable.

So, as I continued to think about this, I decided to adopt this for myself and do a 35 before 35. Most of mine were big and outrageous. If you don’t know me, do not be shocked by this. If you do know me, do not be shocked by this! There were a few smaller goals like learn to swim, eat at a restaurant with a Michelin star and finish a certain novel – we’re not going to talk about said novel, okay?! But others required a lot more out of me than I could give for where I was at that point in my life. There were a few travel goals – visit Italy, somewhere in Africa, Thailand. Actually, there were a lot of travel goals. Too many for someone who wasn’t being paid a livable wage. And someone who, you know, doesn’t have a passport. Anyway, I barely achieved any of those thirty-five things. I did take swim lessons and while I can save myself, I definitely can’t save anyone else. And saving myself – aka how to float –was pretty much the only thing I learned during those lessons. (Remind me to do a blog post on my ridiculous and slightly embarrassing experience of those swim lessons.) I attended a march because taking an active role in dismantling systems is important to me and my work and my life. I worked on my relationship with God. I continue to do the work of being a good ally and becoming a better one. I worked on being present and in the moment. I worked on saying no more because it’s a complete sentence. I didn’t master it but I said it more.

So, with 35 a couple of years in my rearview, I’ve decided to do another round with 40 before 40. Now I will say that I came up with this list at the end of 2019/beginning of 2020. I’d just had a kid, and while I had a few things to catch up on, I was focused and motivated. What I had not anticipated was a global pandemic. With certain travels being restricted and just the personal decision not to especially with a baby, some of my travel goals might not be achieved. I’m okay with that. With concerts being the way they are, those have obviously been put on hold until things get right. But even after, the point is that I’m much more intentional with my time, money and energy. I don’t need to knock out all 40, but I need to be well lived in these next few years. And that is my ultimate goal and these are some of the things I want to knock out to show just that.

I’m not going to list all forty but some of the things listed are the same from the previous list such as being present and saying no more and better allyship. Some are new such as learning to code and visiting 15 MLB stadiums and seeing Beyoncé in concert. I also have perfecting my signature dish, host a dinner party, become a butcher, start a garden. And there are still probably too many travel destinations on my list but oh well. A few countries I hope to hit on one trip via train.

Let me know if you set goals between birthdays or just yearly ones. Also let me know a few things on your list!

Until next time, happy reading and writing!